Darling, for you I think of what I’d do
To keep you safe and sound,
I would climb the highest mountain,
I would swim the widest sea,
I would wrestle a gorilla to the ground.
I would fend off a dozen charging rhinos,
I would capture a storm of killer bees,
I would fight a fiery dragon with a wooden sword
If I didn’t know what this could do to me
’cause it’s too dangerous (too dangerous!)
I’d really like to do it, but I might get hurt.
It’s dangerous (too dangerous!)
I don’t feel like bleeding on my brand new shirt.
You might call me cowardly or say I’ll full of fright,
You might call me yellow,
And baby you’d be right!
So I’d surf across volcanoes full of lava,
I’d even grab a tiger by the tail.
I would make fun of a boxing champion’s mother,
But my courage and my bowels both would fail.
I would fight off a bunch of angry cossacks,
I would stop a thousand bullets with my hand,
I would laugh as my leg was amputated,
But baby, I’m not that kind of man!
’cause it’s too dangerous (too dangerous!)
I use big words but I never do the deed
It’s dangerous (too dangerous!)
I faint like a baby if I see somebody bleed.
I haven’t got a backbone
I’m as timid as a mouse
I would find a cure for this
But I can’t leave the house!
Cause it’s dangerous
Too dangerous
Too dangerous,
For meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
(*then Trevor probably passes out*)